New Adult

On Asking Permission vs. Being Offered It

Posted By serviceslavesecrets 12 hours ago on Adult - My uniform code specifies no hair styling or makeup or jewelry unless you count my collar and watch; no tattoos, piercings, hair cutting or coloring.  It occurs to me very rarely to ask to shake it up; fashion has never been my thing, especially over convenience.    There’s one dress that’s not my uniform that’s… Continue reading →

Noticing the Fork: How the Little Protocols Add Up

Posted By serviceslavesecrets 18 days ago on Adult - 6 PM, and so dinner.  “You may sit,” Mistress said as she took her own place at the table.  I did.  I was moving my napkin to my lap when she added, “You may also start setting my fork on the right side.”  She moved the misplaced utensil.   I stared at the fork for a… Continue reading →

The Benefits of Silence

Posted By serviceslavesecrets 38 days ago on Adult - When I was fifteen, I decided to take a week long vow of silence for a school project.  It required a bit of negotiating with other teachers, and writing was deemed necessary, but a week without speech was deemed doable.  I carried a small makeshift whiteboard mostly to maintain participation points in class, attend extracurriculars,… Continue reading →

Protocols in a New Place

Posted By serviceslavesecrets 39 days ago on Adult - So, we bought a house and moved somewhat recently. Now, we moved in together eight weeks after meeting (and concurrently began our 24/7 power dynamic), so basically the entirety of our relationship has been living together in the one location we lived before we moved.  So for really the first time, we’ve had to see… Continue reading →

Setting Recurring Tasks: What Comes Next

Posted By serviceslavesecrets 51 days ago on Adult - I’ve talked before about adding your own recurring tasks in anticipatory service—or proposing them—and thought I should elaborate a bit on what it can look like after that new task gets added.  I recently went to a lovely Zoom class on anticipatory service, and discussion covered ways to serve throughout the day—from first thing in… Continue reading →

Uniforms and Challenges, the Literal and a Metaphor

Posted By serviceslavesecrets 52 days ago on Adult - Our contract is a simply formatted, single spaced seven or so pages, and this one phrase in it sometimes gives me more conundrums than any others: nice, clean, and of an appropriate size.  This phrase is in the uniform section, and the fact is, being a slave, as wonderful as it is, is messy.    Cooking… Continue reading →

Service Skill: Event Debriefs

Posted By serviceslavesecrets 75 days ago on Adult - Event Debriefs: What Are They? Event debriefs are relatively what they sound like.  The type I’m talking about here is the private post-event reflection for the host (sharing with co-hosts and whatnot can come later).   An “event” is what you make it out to be, and you should set your own standards for what… Continue reading →

Why I Chose Irrevocable Consent as a Label, What It Means to Me, and Why I Write About It

Posted By serviceslavesecrets 77 days ago on Adult - TPE, TAT, no safewords, no limits, no way out, no “no”, owned, CNC, irrevocable consent, blanket consent, slave, property—  There are a lot of words, phrases, and acronyms used to talk about this area, many of which have other definitions, too.  It’s a lot to sum up.  It can sound simple, but the totality of… Continue reading →

On Potato Peeling and Shakespearean Sonnets (Or, “Is It More Submissive to Enjoy Everything You’re Ordered to Do, or to Dislike Those Tasks but Do Them Anyway?”)

Posted By serviceslavesecrets 78 days ago on Adult - It’s amazing how much time I spend peeling potatoes, I message my mom, because her first message of the day, always around the time she settles in at home after work and the time I am beginning to prepare dinner, again has found me peeling potatoes, perhaps the third time in a bit over a… Continue reading →

Balancing Control and Decision-Making as a Service

Posted By serviceslavesecrets 79 days ago on Adult - I’ve touched on the spectrum between control-oriented and service-oriented dynamics before.  Dynamics based at their core in the active exertion of power, authority, and structure, enforcing rules, protocols, and routines, versus dynamics based on the idea of being useful, helpful, and completing tasks, chores, and assignments.    There is no reason a dynamic can’t include… Continue reading →